I am brave. I learned how to create a business from nothing, stepped up to most challenges, created new working and personal relationships, and worked hard on making a space where everyone can feel comfortable and safe.
I am a coward. I did not speak up often, and have a lot of regrets that I didn’t use the power I now have when hearing others say hateful things. I let a lot of important decisions slide because I thought I could trust others to do their part. I chose anger over empathy, and pretended I didn’t have a choice.
I both forgot and discovered different parts of who I am. I like sparkly nail polish, the colour pink and being feminine, lipstick, and long, flowing dresses. My depression and anxiety returned with a vengeance, so perhaps I am disguising my inside with my out. I hate myself while attempting to show that I love myself.
I need to trust others more. I need to remember that I am not alone in this. That I will not be weakened by talking. This is my hardest lesson, and one that is most definitely not complete.
I learned that no matter what happens today, tomorrow really does have a chance to be better. If I must be stubborn, I will try to make it that about that in 2016.
December 31, 2015 at 1:00 pm
Wonderful post. I just know that you’re going to have a great 2016. All the best to you and the Husband.